Happiness is a Choice - No Matter What.

You can be happy no matter what happens in your life if you don’t let others control your attitude.  This is a very deep statement.  How can we live like this?  How do we apply this theory to our life?  

Over the last few months, I have seen a lot of unhappy people lash out on social media, because of what they believe is going on, not what they researched, not what they have facts on, just what they believe is going on from comments and gossip.  

Recently over lunch a friend of mine said “you must have skin as thick as steel for all the things that get thrown at you.”  I pondered on that the rest of the day.  A Bible Study on the book Philippian that I recently completed came to mind. 

In Philippians 1:15-17, Paul shares with us four kinds of people that were impacting his ministry while he was imprisoned in Rome.   There were his friends and “co-workers” that supported and encouraged him in his work.   Others were busy criticizing, competing, or conspiring against his ministry.  

Paul wrote “It is true that some preach Christ out of envy and rivalry, but others out of goodwill. The latter do so out of love, knowing that I am put here for the defense of the gospel. The former preach Christ out of selfish ambition, not sincerely, supposing that they can stir up trouble for me while I am in chains.” Philippians 1:15-17

There is nothing that robs your happiness faster than being criticized while working hard or feeling like others are working against us.  Why?  We want approval and to be liked.  It is human nature.  

Paul goes on to say in  Philippians 1:18, “It does not matter! I am happy about it — just so Christ is preached in every way possible, whether from wrong or right motives. And I will continue to be happy.”

During the recent tornado, I made a post at the direction of another emergency management organization, regarding clothing donations.   The post was posted, I logged off, and went on about my business.  As I was sitting around a table with some new friends from Missouri Baptist Disaster Relief that were ministering to a woman who was at the brink of having a nervous breakdown, my phone rang, it was the EMD calling to chat with me about the post I made.   

They explained to me that people complained I was not easy to work with.  I was completely caught off guard, I had just finished hugging a sobbing woman, and building a plan to add more showers to a community without water and electricity.  I took the “whipping” and hung up the phone.  Still in shock.  As I stood there for a moment my phone began to ding.  Text message after text message with screenshots of horrible things being said about me.  I was a dictator, a glory whore, someone who controls everything.   It wasn’t me.  Not really.  I probably would have never made the post unless directed, but it was a post that needed to be made. Clothing can be a disaster within a disaster.  I can share more another day on that.  

This post has spiraled numerous times, grown wings and became another post, and brought on additional rumors and gossip about me.   While many of those posting are declaring “they love Jesus.”     

As my friend and I chatted about the critics in our community (hi critics), I thought about Paul’s message in Philippians 1:18, “It does not matter! I am happy about it — just so Christ is preached in every way possible, whether from wrong or right motives. And I will continue to be happy.”

I have adopted this motive for my community work over the past few months.   It does not matter what others do, just so the good in my community is shown everywhere as much as possible, and as loud as possible.   

Start fifty new Facebook pages with fifty new groups; maybe 50,000 new people will see something about our community and drive to our town and fall in love with it.   Talk about me on threads and tell people what you think - every time you do, someone new comes into my shop to figure out who I am, and guess what,  I get to show them the love of Jesus.   

Happiness is Choice

I am happy as I choose to be! If others are unhappy with me, that’s their choice. If I don’t have someone’s approval now, I am probably not going to get it. And I am going to be miserable if I try to live for the approval of everybody else or those that simply don’t like me.  

Paul explains in verses 29 and 30 of 1 Philippians why you can be happy no matter what: “For you have been given not only the privilege of trusting in Christ but also the privilege of suffering for him. We are in this struggle together. You have seen my struggle in the past, and you know that I am still in the midst of it” (NLT). 

Paul tells us it is a privilege to suffer when you’re doing the right thing because you’re most like Jesus nailing you to a cross and trying to get at you.

I can be happy no matter what happens if I look at every problem from God’s viewpoint and never let what other people say or do control my happiness. 

Mississippi River to the Backroads Antique & Treasure Trail - Downtown Cape Girardeau to Dexter, Missouri

Follow the trail to find unique stops through southeast Missouri. 70 miles of fun and beautiful scenery/ 

Pastimes Antiques: 45 N. Main Street, Cape Girardeau, MO 

Annie-Em’s at Home: 42 N. Main Street, Cape Girardeau, MO 

Back Porch Antiques and Collectibles: 27 N. Main Street, Cape Girardeau, MO 

Premiere Antiques and More: 19 N. Main Street, Cape Girardeau, MO 

Spanish Street Mercantile: 26 N. Spanish Street, Cape Girardeau, MO 

Brick Street Gallery: 19 N. Spanish Street, Cape Girardeau, MO 

Annie Laurie’s: 536 Broadway Street, Cape Girardeau, MO 

River City Coins and Jewelry: 713 Broadway Street, Cape Girardeau, MO 

Lodging Options in Cape Girardeau: www.visitcape.com/stay/

The Old Pioneer Market: 2370 N High St Jackson MO

Heartland Harvest Market & Antiques: 3277 State Highway 72, Jackson, MO

Knowlan Family Farm: 3243 State Highway 34, Burfordville, MO 

Ava Craft Center 2.0 SEMO: 134 State Highway U, Burfordville, MO 

The Rusted Vault: 107 High Street, Marble Hill, MO 

Sunset Floral & Garden Market: 115 State Highway 51 North, Marble Hill, MO 

Serenity House Floral & More: 214 Conrad Ave, Marble Hill, MO 

Second Time Around: 114 First Street, Marble Hill, MO 

First Street Market: 206 First Street, Marble Hill, MO 

Old Lutesville Emporium: 203 First Street, Marble Hill, MO 

Unique Treasures: 112B First Street, Marble Hill, MO 

Bill Peters Hardware: 313 First Street, Marble Hill, MO 

Lodging Options in Marble Hill: www.bocomochamber.com/p/bollinger-county-missourilodging.html

Leopold Country Store: 201 W Main St, Leopold, MO 

Arab Station: 3725 State Highway 51, Zalma

MK T's: 105-C North Oak, Advance MO 

The Midway: 260 E. Richardson, Puxico

Yoder Garden Shop and Deli: 22864 State Highway 25, Bloomfield, MO 

Stars and Stripes Museum 17377 Stars and Stripes Way, Bloomfield, MO 

Country Pickins’ Flea Market - Bloomfield: 801 MO-25, Bloomfield, MO 

Trinkets & Treasures: 10 E Stoddard St, Dexter, MO 

Old Timers Antique Mall: 16655 N Outer Rd, Dexter, MO 

The Midway, Puxico, Missouri

 A friend of mine sent me a Facebook post about The Midway and said, “you need to try this place out.”

It had my brain intrigued; I love a good small-town place that hasn’t been blasted by all the news media outlets. 

The Midway in Puxico, Missouri - town population 873, business rating 10 Star -  “I am not in Missouri anymore standards.”  

We were greeted at the front door by who I later learned to be one of the owners, this was by chance, because there was no way he knew who I was, and no way I knew who he was.   He showed us the dining area on the main level, but then suggested the Goat’s Pen upstairs.  Live music, fun seating, and full-service menu!  My friends and I are always out for a fun time!  

The owner, still not knowing who I was, escorted us upstairs.  We chatted about the building and his business!   Stop, Note, if you love tastefully decorated places with a mix of antiques and modern, this is YOUR place!   This building is beautiful and perfectly laid out!  

As we arrived upstairs there were four of us and the only tables left were 2 seaters.  We were willing to squeeze in, but they fixed that, he pushed tables together and made it work for our party of 4.   They had live music play, they had people visiting, and the environment was well done!  

Their menu, add a little hillbilly word to a New York City Menu and that’s it!   Spoon & Spout is what they called the kitchen serving us, they have sections that do special menus, almost like a Wall Drug Store but with restaurants.  

Appetizer: Goat Tags, usually cut potatoes, smothered with all the things that make them good!  This was the perfect appetizer for all four of us to share!  The price?  Comparable to the big chain restaurants that buy in bulk.  Win Win Goat Tags for Dinner!  

Not just Goat Tags, the waitress presented their menu and my jaw dropped.  How in the world do they afford to serve this kind of food in this kind of building for this kind of price!   You will NOT go bankrupt eating there!  I mean you could, but not likely!   

I chose their advertised Mediterranean Stuffed Pork Tenderloin - the tenderloin is stuffed, then topped with a balsamic glaze. It is served with Gouda mashed potatoes and a side salad.  Okay the Gouda mashed potatoes are not served, they are presented!  Like for kings and queens, carefully placed on your plate in a beautiful design.  The flavor of all was absolutely “I am not in Missouri anymore standards.”  Ding Ding, Stuffed Pork Tenderloin for dinner! 

Trey decided to try the Pork Ribeye - the pork ribeye is topped with an apple cider reduction glaze and a pineapple, with a side is a warm potato salad.  I snuck a taste!  Again, “I am not in Missouri anymore standards.”   I see people driving from Texas to eat this food!  It is that good! 

Dessert?  The Custard Coop is their opening soon frozen custard shop, but until then they have dessert handled.   I ordered a warm blackberry cobbler, it was as good as Grandma made it.  I ordered a chocolate peanut butter parfait thing for Trey (yes, I decided for him) and it was amazing!  The best I have ever had!  The presentation was beautiful as well!  Again, “I am not in Missouri anymore standards.”

After dinner we took a peek around their gift shop and the downstairs dining room.  I may have also taken a seat on their vintage furniture after all, I am an antique expert, sorta.  

I do highly recommend taking a trip to The Midway.  Make it a weekend trip to Southeast Missouri.  

Close by to The Midway: Mingo National Wildlife Refuge, Duck Creek Conservation Area, Yoder’s Garden’s Shop, Lake Wappapello State Park, or follow the Rural Southeast Missouri Treasure Trails.  

Disclosure:  I was not paid or compensated for my review.   When I arrived at The Midway, they did not know who I was.  It was not until after I left and I posted about The Midway that my identity was known.  I prefer to eat and visit places that do not know me; that way I get authentic service and see how they really treat people.  

More Photos from our visit to The Midway Available Here: https://www.facebook.com/100057663506972/posts/pfbid022yQ8kmFmSo4bjiC7UcAZEacamYs1FcpPwdh9AEJH59iVQNNy1tsfe8EWgju2Svysl/?mibextid=cr9u03

What will it cost? Actions of hate, bitterness, destruction?

 If you are serious about getting a focused life, you need to ask three questions: 1) What will it cost? 2) What am I willing to give? 3) Is it worth it?

 The greatest use of your life is to invest it in something that will outlast it. Jesus said, "What good is it for a man to gain the whole world, yet forfeit his soul?" (Mark 8:36 NIV) Don't begin working toward your goals until you've counted the cost. 

This was my Bible Study this morning, but fit my life and the trials that I have been thrown. 

There is a lot of cost to the actions people take and words they say.   Your temporary emotion of anger, hate, bitterness, jealousy, envy, or lust can sink a ship that you believe is unsinkable. 

Written words do not go away.  We have screenshots these days!  

Currently there is a woman on social media that refers to me as “the mayor’s wife” as if I am nameless and unknown to her.

That woman is my eldest sister.  She is very angry with me because over the past few years I did not allow her opinions or beliefs dictate my life, my family, and sometimes my community.  I stood firm for what is right and good. 

After outburst of anger and her partnering with lies, I blocked her from seeing my Facebook.  The one time she did text me to tell me what to do in regards to caring for my Dad - I refused to answer her.  I didn’t need instructions and could talk directly to my Dad about his needs. My Dad is the expert at being my Dad and what he needs.  

My sister is blinded by anger.  She has wrote torrid tales about the “Mayor’s Wife” and how the “Mayor’s Wife” has done things.  Yet, she don’t really know what I have done or said other than the screenshots from people who feed her anger. 

While I mostly ignore her rants and dictation of what she believes is right; I feel sorry for her. 

This is not a new concept, read the book of Genesis and how many families and friends were torn apart and how far people would go out of anger. 

 Cain murdered his brother Abel over jealousy. (Genesis 4:1–18)

Joseph was sold into slavery by his brothers, they were jealous. (Genesis 37:18-36)

I am not concerned about being murdered or being sold into slavery; God’s will be done.  

My concern is what if I am the only match for a kidney transplant for her? And my family is left to make the decision?  

Would their hearts forgive her for the awful things she posted and screenshot and ranted?  Would they forgive her for the fact that we no longer have family dinners with my parents and it has become a great competition over who takes my Dad to the doctor - because one can’t let the other shine brighter?  Although I typically sit out on the competition, it’s just too exhausting.  

Would they forgive her for the turmoil in my community that she added to? 

While I have no doubts they have good hearts; I also know that to find current peace she is blocked by them on every outlet of social media and they refuse to read her text message.  So if the call comes it may never be received.  

This is sad for me.  

Even sadder is, my sister (and many others) are highly intelligent people that could do so much more good than bad, but instead they spent their last 3 days looking for bad, spreading bad, and being furious about what they thought happened - but really didn’t.  

They could have spent the last 3 days getting real answers (like I did and have the facts in my email) and bring truth and peace to our community.  

I don’t blame my sister, while she is the one did the act; there is a greater power working behind the scenes.  A power who wants destruction and no one to have peace.  That power is Satan.  

I pray my sister and others find focus and see the cost of their actions.  I pray that they see spreading hate, fueling fires, and living for destruction is not healthy or good - it will in the end destroy them.  

Restaurant Reviews by The Missouri Mom

 I was recently asked why I rarely review a restaurant in my own town.   I really do want my town to be the most successful it can be, but there is authenticity to my reviews and a level of biasness I hold for my community.  It is hard to give a non-bias review to people you know.  

Here are my rules to restaurant reviews: 

I rarely announce I am coming.  I like to catch the wait staff, owners, and chef by surprise.  I don't tell them who I am, but once I leave, I check in at their establishment and share an instant review.  Then I follow up with a full review and send it to the place as I am posting it on my own social media.   They have no way of changing my review or asking for favors. 

I rarely take compensated meals.   I occasionally work with tourism offices and accept gift cards that are good at any restaurant and once in a while a restaurant like Madison's Cafe in Jefferson City did before will recognize me or invite me back for a visit and I will accept it.  I do love the calamari at Madison's Cafe.  

My reviews are not professionally written and pitched to magazines.  Occasionally, the review will run in our local paper as my column, but I am not doing this for money, I do it for fun. and I love to support small businesses.  

I do not do reviews for favors.  Please do not send me your restaurant and ask me to come.  I do take tips on good places to eat from locals or others in the area, but I will not accept a meal in return for a review.  It is simply impossible to be authentic in that case.  

If you have seen me at your restaurant and I have not written a review; I either had an okay experience with okay food or I simply was not in the mood to write.  Don't take it personal. I will likely be back.  

Please follow me on Facebook at The Missouri Mom for more reviews!  

Sunset after the Storm

Black River Electric Crews in Glen Allen, MO

 

60 Seconds or Less

Did you know that the crew at McDonalds is expected to have your order ready and through the pickup line in 60 seconds?  Sixty seconds.  One minute.  That is insane.  Some of us cannot even walk across our living room in

sixty seconds.  Me, I am some of us, because I will trip over things, but that is another story.  

I pulled up at the drive thru window at McDonalds the other day and the girl was rushing to get my drink, take an order, make change.  She must have been barely sixteen.  Stress was all over her face.  I sat there as she shuffled, giving me my drink, straw, and change.  I smiled and told her to have a nice day, but the automatic window slammed shut.  It was a sad scene from an unpersonable world.  

When I grew up there was a different dining joint that sat where McDonalds sat.  The only thing that came in sixty seconds was the next tall tale, the smoke clung in the air for more than sixty seconds, and the grease on the wall was older than me.  The food was as good as the now popular AJ’s (I do recommend AJ’s, tell Rob hello, and ask if he is working hard), the staff was sometimes as friendly as the late Jer (I miss Jer), and you could feed the whole family for less than a thin crust pizza from Harps.   

Now I am not downing McDonald’s; my own daughter learned customer service there or as we sometimes call it customer patience.  Some of you might remember her or she remembers you - as you might have yelled and cussed her out when she asked you to pull forward or advised that the ice cream machine was down for a third time that week.  

The first time I saw her walk the other way in the grocery store away from a well-known and respected businessman, I questioned her.  She said “Mom, that man is the most hateful man I know, he uses words I didn’t know existed over ice cream.”  I chuckled, but was sad at the same time.  What businessman cusses at a group of part-time teenage fast food workers making minimum wage that has 60 seconds to get your order ready? 

I wonder if that man cussed out the workers at the 3-Way Cafe?  I know he dined there a time or two, I sat at a table diagonal from him at least once.

Then I wonder if he would behave that way at the grocery store, the bank, the doctor's office, or anywhere else that normally hires adults?  Would he walk into my business and yell and scream at my employees?  Most of them are other local business owner’s teenage kids working part time for me.  

Is he the only one that doesn’t have it his way in 60 seconds has a toddler-like meltdown? I can answer that - NO, follow any local Facebook feed and you will see pages of rants on our local McDonalds, Dollar General, and the price of eggs at Harps. 

60 seconds or less to have our order right, must be $5 cheaper than Walmart even if it cost $10 in gas to get to Walmart, and must have 42 professionally trained people working for free to keep up with never ending stock trucks and lack of manpower. 

There are some real champions in our community.  I don’t always know their names, because sometimes they hide their name badges - I would too. 

 

At McDonald’s you will find 60 Second Match Winners; they take your order, work hard to get it right, and often take 3 more before you get to the window. They take your payment with people talking in their ear, and they make sure you have enough or little enough ice to make your day right!  Cheers to you Marble Hill McDonalds!  You are my People!  

At Dollar General; Patton, Marble Hill, and Arab the 900,000 Pallets of Freight Winners.  Dollar General is the second largest retail store in our county - never a slow day of customers.  They get Christmas merchandise in July and Easter at Thanksgiving.  Their card machines are broken 90% percent of the time and this is a nationwide problem, go to any Dollar General anywhere.  So yes, I once made a joke about their hours, but in truth, it’s not them, it’s corporate and our local people are working hard!  Thank you for serving our county!  

The Heart-Filled Harps Team!  The sad truth is Harps bought Country Mart at a bad time - Covid 2020.  The shortages, inflation, stock changes, remodels, supplier changes, no toilet paper, no beans, egg prices up, egg prices down, egg prices up, are they going down again? I have seen front row Christians say horrible things about one of the largest non-tax funded employers and their staff in our county.   A business that hires and trains young men and women from stocker to management.  A business that is one of our largest sales tax producers in the county - sales tax that supports our schools, road and bridge, and law enforcement.  The Harps team works hard, they are knowledgeable, giving, and care about our community.  There has never been a time that I have had to ask for extra supplies for our community gardens, because Harps covers it.  They also cover free food giveaway, Senior breakfast, and many more activities.  They love our community and still take a beating.  

Corporations make a lot of decisions for big local businesses, but the people who work there are still our people.  They still matter.  They are still part of our community.  

So the next time the ice cream machine is down at McDonald’s remember that might be a future customer of yours, sir.  

Mam’ the next time you don’t have it your way, remember that Facebook post might be read by your former customer, as they might not be your customer anymore.  

Take those 60 seconds, Give Grace.   

Not a Lumberjack

April 3, 2013, just after moving home (with my kids), my Dad had me

follow him across the farm to where a tree had been cut down.  

When we arrived he handed me sledgehammer and a wedge; then told me to “learn how strong you really are.”

After I split the log up he said “document this, so you never forget how strong you are and where you get that strength from.”

Every hard day, I try to remember that day and the lessons I learned: 

* Carry the biggest hammer you can swing. 

* Your arms will wear out, but your heart will keep you going.  

* My Dad is my Cheerleader no matter what.  

* I am not a lumberjack.

Rural Southeast Missouri Antiques & Treasures Trail: Jackson, MO to Piedmont, MO

Rural Southeast Missouri Antiques & Treasures Trail
Jackson, Missouri to Piedmont, Missouri
67-mile scenic drive filled with treasures and unique stops.

The Old Pioneer Market: 2370 N High St, Jackson, Missouri 63755

Heartland Harvest Market & Antiques: 3277 State Highway 72, Jackson, Missouri 63755

Knowlan Family Farm: 3243 State Highway 34, Burfordville, MO 63739

Ava Craft Center 2.0 SEMO: 134 State Highway U, Burfordville, MO 63739

Bollinger County Coop: 200 State Highway 34 W, Marble Hill, MO 63764

The Rusted Vault: 107 High Street, Marble Hill, MO 63764

Sunset Floral & Garden Market: 115 State Highway 51 North, Marble Hill, MO 63764

Mercantile At The Commons: 309 Presnell, Marble Hill, MO 63764

Serenity House Floral & More: 214 Conrad Ave, Marble Hill, MO 63764

Second Time Around: 114 First Street, Marble Hill, MO 63764

First Street Market: 206 First Street, Marble Hill, MO 63764

Old Lutesville Emporium: 203 First Street, Marble Hill, MO 63764

Unique Treasures: 112B First Street, Marble Hill, MO 63764

Bill Peters Hardware: 313 First Street, Marble Hill, MO 63764

Twin City Pharmacy: 106 North First Street, Marble Hill, MO 63764

The Personal Touch: : 205 St Hwy 34W, Marble Hill, MO 63764

The Mason Jar at Mesta Meadows: 12005 State Highway 34, Glen Allen, MO 63751

Grassy General Store: 4834 State Hwy 34, Glen Allen, MO 63751

Northtown Thrift Store: 154 N Front Street, Greenville, MO 63944

Frankie Mart: 250 E Maple St, Greenville, MO. 63944

Richard’s Supermarket: 110 Main St., Greenville, MO 63944

Trail's End Coffee and Cafe: 101 Main Street, Greenville, MO

Soul Threads:  95 State Hwy 143, Patterson, MO  63956

Angie’s Stop n Shop: 106 N Main St, Piedmont, MO 63957

Johnson's Farm and Pet:  13303 State Highway 34 Piedmont, MO 63957

​Piedmont Florist: 227 N Main St, Piedmont, MO, 63957 

Rick's Pawn:  115 N Main, Piedmont, MO, 63957

​The Nature Cottage:  302 Legion Park RD, Piedmont, MO  63957

Born a Female, Made a Feminist

Sunday over lunch I told my family “I am a feminist” and they laughed at me.  

As I sat there, I remembered we have forgotten what a true feminist is.  It’s not someone fighting for entitlement; it is someone fighting for equality.  

I was not born a feminist; I was born a female. As I got older, I realized there was “man’s work” and there was “women’s work” in some folk’s eyes.  I did both.  I mostly didn’t have time to wait on a man or there wasn’t a man around to do the work.  

When I was a young adult, I realized that some folks expected me to do “man’s work” for a “woman’s pay” even though “woman’s pay" really didn’t exist in any employee handbook. 

Responsible for Sunflowers?

Today, an elderly couple walked into our shop, and we started chatting about what was here and what is here now in our little town.  So many things have changed over the years.  The Dime Store, Wallis Family Store, Ricketts Boot Store, Chandler Drug Store, Barkers Furniture Store, ect..  Names of the past, but not forgotten.  We established kinship.  Who she knew that I was related to and who I knew that she was related to.  This is normal in a small business.  

As our conversation continued, she looked straight at me and said, “are you the lady responsible” and I stopped her, I said, “mam, I am not responsible.”  She laughed and said, “I am not here to complain, I was going to say the sunflowers during the summer.”